Writer. Editor. Explorer. Creator.

Tag: Food

Preconceived Notions: Geelong, Australia

Preconceived Notions is a feature I do before traveling to a new place. I think it will be interesting to see how my impressions of a place change once I get to know it. Disclaimer: the whole point of this exercise is to expose my ignorance, please don’t @ me telling me how wrong I am. That is the point. Thank you.

The very first house sit I set up when I conceived of this mission was to take place in Australia. More than six months prior, I agreed to head down under to take care of two Russian Blue kitties just outside of Melbourne.

I’d been to Australia before, but while I was studying abroad I never made it down to Melbourne, let alone to the Melbourne suburbs. As it is a very large country, I think it is fair enough to not expect to know what one area is like having experienced a few others.

Before arriving to my house sit in Geelong, I was honestly not expecting anything too extraordinary. When I first arrived in Australia in 2004, my immediate impression on the shuttle from the airport to our dorms was, “Ah, it’s like if Canada and Florida had a baby.”

Unlike that journey, this trip will not be in the tropics. Geelong is a large suburb outside of Melbourne, so I was imagining a pretty normal place, maybe even painfully so, such as Highlands Ranch (Colorado), or Stamford (Connecticut), or Quincy (Massachusetts), etc.

Kangaroo
Obviously, I’d see a lot of these bad boys

Having done this flight before, one thing I was really dreading was the exceptionally long journey across the Pacific. When I flew from L.A. to Sydney in 2004, I didn’t have the best time. I am not the best sleeper even in the coziest of circumstances, so sleeping on a plane certainly doesn’t come easily. For the flight, I decided to take a bunch of NyQuil, have a couple of glasses of wine and pass out.

NyQuil, it turns out, is for babies, and was not at all strong enough to take me down. So, instead of sleeping, at all, I was awake the whole flight but was really, really exhausted the whole time. It was torture. After learning this lesson on the way there, I resigned to stay up the full 15 hours on the way back, and it was much better.

Going into this house sit, I basically was just imagining super friendly people, tasty, slightly weird food (Tim Tams PLEASE), döner kebabs for me to munch on, inexpensive shopping, etc.

Since I wasn’t able to come to this part of the country during my last trip down under, I intended to go see the Great Ocean Road (did I make it?! Only those who don’t follow my social media don’t know). I was also planning to take a couple of train rides into Melbourne proper and explore the city. I also thought I would ideally take advantage of the lack of language barrier and do some more comedy. All in all, I expected to meet some more folks, chill out, and get some writing done.

Stay tuned to see if my expectations were spot on.

Six Weeks in Southeastern France

I spent six weeks in the foothills of the French Alps and it wasn’t long enough.

French Countryside

My daily view

This house sit is one for the record books. Don’t let the months that have elapsed since I was there tone down my enthusiasm at all. This place was beautiful. It was peaceful. It was conducive to productivity. I could have stayed there for a very long time.

On an evening in late June, I landed at the Geneva airport. I was instructed to meet my hosts in the jazz club as soon as I exited the airport. Jazz club. Airport. Sure.

French Countryside

From the backyard

The first sign that this was a different place was that they were right. There was a jazz club, in the airport, with actual live jazz music. People were there. Listening to jazz. Okay, Switzerland, you got me.

At first glance, my hosts were very lovely and very British. I was pleased immediately. We drove the hour or so to their home in France and chatted the whole way. As we drove through the hills and little towns, I stared agape at my surroundings. I couldn’t get over the beauty and the quaintness. Everything was SO quaint. The hills were rolling. Everything was green and perfect and out of some sort of fictional tale. I couldn’t believe it. As we went on, the sights just got better and better.

France Abandoned Bathtub

When we pulled into the house, it was dusk. We were surrounded by mountains and hills. Vast fields dotted with a few homes stretched in each direction. I couldn’t believe it. I was going to be waking up to this for over a month? Pinch me now.

This was a wonderful place for me to be. Despite the relative seclusion and loneliness (I really don’t speak French beyond being able to order some things while really butchering the accent), I could have stayed for a much longer. While there, I got into a real groove with my productivity and writing. They had so many places to sit and write, read, or think. There were multiple outdoor tables, patios, and indoor tables with beautiful views.

Digital Nomad Workspace

Something I have encountered a lot of, and I don’t quite understand, is people who have outdoor spaces, but nowhere to sit in them. I simply cannot comprehend such things. I’ve also learned that I am far more productive when I’m in natural light, either actually outside or near a large window.

This is a part of France that I might never have thought to come and see. There weren’t many tourists. Perhaps partly because of this, I highly recommend it. It was such an authentic, beautiful place; the picturesque, French countryside. Read on for some specifics.

Little Town

Lescheraines France

The walk into town

I’m pretty sure this place is exactly what Belle was singing about. Little town, it’s a quiet village. Every day like the one before! The little town of Lescheraines only had the things it needed. There was the boulangerie (bakery) which made the most amazing croissants and pastries. It may come as no surprise, but baked goods in France are really no joke. They had a butcher, a small grocery shop, a cheese shop, a couple of boutiques, two restaurants, one ATM, and that’s it. A short walk away was the little swimming lake/beach which also had a restaurant.

Le plan d eau

The swimming lake

Siesta time kept getting in my way because I would wake up and immediately start productivity. By the time I was ready to head into town for lunch or supplies, it would be 1-2pm and shops closed from like 12-3pm. Essentially, they were trying to starve me. It was a challenge.

Driving Stick

Plan d eau lescheraines

The homeowners had quite generously left me a car. Of course, it being Europe, the car had a standard transmission. I had not driven a stick car for probably over 10 years, and I hadn’t even fully gotten the hang of it back then. I watched some YouTube videos to remind myself how and took to the cul-de-sac to practice. The problem with this, though, was that as I did this (not very well), every single time at least one neighbor would come out and just stare me down. This made me incredibly self-conscious, as I was stalling a bit, and I had no real way to explain to them what I was doing. I couldn’t really get off our road until I was comfortable because there was no way to avoid hills in any direction. Eventually, I gave up on the idea of being able to drive anywhere and I stuck to moving around by foot or by bike. This is fine because it was good for my health and also stopped me from trying to do too much, so I was able to really dig into my surroundings.

Night of 1,000 Spiders

spider killer

Modern Weaponry

My first night there was action-packed. After arriving, and having dinner, and not being able to wipe the wide-eyed smile off my face, I retired to the little in-law apartment on their ground floor. At about 2 am, I woke up to use the bathroom. When I came back, I noticed a spider. Then another. Then another. Then another. They were EVERYWHERE. I usually try not to kill spiders if they are just chilling… But, the sheer amount of these guys meant that the mathematical probability was that at least ONE would crawl into my bed while sleeping. I couldn’t have it. I pulled my bed away from the wall and sat there for ages not knowing what to do. How could I reach them? The ceilings were high. I didn’t yet know where any cleaning supplies, or really anything, was. They were everywhere. I was awake for hours, sitting in the middle of the bed just looking at all of them. Finally, I found a broom and put my Birkenstock on the end of it and went to town on them. I killed 8 before dawn. One or two got away but I was able to get them in the bathroom in the morning. For the rest of the trip, I was more or less able to keep them at bay due to some hefty poison and vigilance.

The Animals

Kitty roll

Miss Mimi

The stars of this show were the three hens. The homeowners affectionately call them “The Girls,” and would even sign off on emails saying “from, HO1, HO2, and ‘The Girls’,” no joke. This house sit consisted of two separate trips for the homeowners, and during the first trip, one of The Girls, Brunhilde (is there a better chicken name? I dare you to find one), started losing her feathers. This put me into a bit of a panic because I didn’t want it to seem like I was neglecting her in any way. During these days it was pretty hot, but I always made sure they had plenty of water scattered all over the yard. I also kept an eye on the other chickens to see if maybe she was being bullied, but I didn’t see anything out of the ordinary. By the time they came back the first time, she was on the upswing again and was fine for the remainder of my stay. I guess she was just going through her own thing.

three hens

Brunhilda, Samantha, and Portia

The Girls were hilarious because the three of them would walk around like gossipy little old ladies. The 2-3 eggs I got a day were amazing. Fresh eggs for breakfast, egg salad, french toast, you name it. They had a bit of mischief in them, too. One of the things the husband asked of me before they left was to water the lettuce patch, as he had some really nice young lettuces in there. Well, every time I turned my back, those ladies were in the lettuce patch and I’m sad to say, the lettuce did not make it. I tried to put up barricades and everything but nothing worked.

Cat cuddles

Morning cuddles with Mimi

They also had a mostly outdoor cat named Mimi. Mimi was super adorable, and every morning we would have a very serious cuddle. She would get so excited about these cuddles, she would drool and it was ADORABLE. The best thing about Mimi is that since she was mostly an outdoor cat, she didn’t touch her litter box, which meant I didn’t have to either. She was super easy to care for because of this and I just made sure she was filled up on dry and wet food and water. Oh, and I couldn’t forget the cat milk. That’s right, people. Cat milk. The main question that ran through my mind every time I poured her some cat milk was, “But who milks the cats?!”

Cat Milk

Cat Milk!?

An Unwanted Guest

There were a few cats in the neighborhood that would come calling from time to time. One of these was a little grey kitten from across the way. He was full of mischief, always trying to hunt the chickens who were easily double his size.

One night, I was sitting and watching something on Netflix. It was storming outside, which was wonderful. All of a sudden, I heard a commotion outside. I know that the first rule of any horror movie is not to open the door when you hear a commotion in the night. However, I was there looking after some animals and what if Mimi had gotten herself into trouble or something? As I went over to open the door, there was more commotion and I could see the silhouette of a cat climbing the door through the frosted glass.

I was thinking that maybe there was a fox or some other predator out there, or who knows what. So, I opened the door and it was the kitten from across the street. He jumped off the door and ran off. I figured that was about it and I went back inside. As I closed the door, however, I looked up and saw this:

furry intruder

Uh oh!

This little squirrel, or sugar glider, or whatever it was, had clearly run up the door to evade the kitten, and now he was stuck in my little apartment. While he was super cute, I had no interest in getting my mitts near his little teefies. I was in a pickle.

I stood around and laughed for a while, but eventually had to make my move. I turned off the lights inside (bugs) and opened the door. I had to chase off the grey kitten who was still lingering. I, then, got the broom and gently encouraged the little fella out the door, which you can sort of see in the videos below. Eventually, he made it and bounded off into the night. It was a very silly predicament.

Meeting People

Cows

“Les Boeufs”

For the most part, this was a pretty solitary stop. As I do not speak French, meeting people was pretty challenging. I can be decent at reading it, but I cannot pronounce that language for anything. The neighbor was super friendly and would come over to check in every now and then. If she caught me without my phone for translating, our communications would be pretty hilarious. One day, the farmer up behind us let his herd of cattle come flooding down to the fields right by our houses. When the neighbor came over, I wanted to explain why the chickens had to remain in their run. I did not know the word for “cow” but I did know the word for “beef,” so I essentially said, “The beefs! The beefs!” over and over while gesturing. She politely corrected me.

2018 World Cup Final

Watching the World Cup Final

Toward the end of my stay, France ended up in the World Cup final. I was excited by this. I also am convinced that I have great World Cup luck. Spain won while I was there, and now France. Just in case people want to sponsor my travels each World Cup season. Anyway, I biked over to the slightly larger neighboring village to go to a pub and catch the game. Everything was pretty tame. Surprisingly tame. In fact, I missed the first goal because nobody made a peep.

I kept catching what I thought were snippets of English from a neighboring table. Eventually one of the men came up to the bar and I asked him, “Do I hear you guys speaking English?” and he was like, “We sure do! We’re Scottish! Come sit with us.” And friendships were made. They were two couples, one of which has a vacation home in the area. I very quickly became betrothed to one of their sons (unbeknownst to him). We had a good time, AND I made plans with one of the women to attend the American Party with her the following weekend. I ended up staying later than intended because I was having fun finally socializing. This meant that getting home involved barrelling down the pitch black hilly road on my bike. Luckily I had my headlamp.

Headlamp Nerd

Ready to ride!

American PartyAmerican Bauges

One trip to the boulangerie, I saw this sign for a USA-themed party. Line dancing! Cars! Trucks! Teepees! Hamburgers! Hot Dogs! This is basically the equivalent of us throwing a French party with striped shirts, berets, neckerchiefs, and baguettes back home. I couldn’t WAIT to see the USA portrayed in whatever lens this was.

Teepee

I made plans to meet Scottish Christine and her future daughter-in-law for some good craic. As we walked in, the first thing I saw and heard was a few people outfitted in Native American garb, dancing a Native American dance. I cannot speak to the accuracy of any of this, but I can only hope they did their research or perhaps that at least some of them had native ancestry. The Scots were amused and surprised at how uncomfortable all this made me. I had to tell them that this sort of thing would not fly back home in the present day. However uncomfortable I was with my white guilt, I suppose it was cool that the native population was at all represented when people from France thought of the United States.

You know when you go to a festival and you need to buy tickets in order to get food or beverage? Well, here you bought American Dollars that you then used to “pay” for beer, wine, and food. I got a huge kick out of this.

American Dollars

American Dollars!

They had booths selling all kinds of wares: handmade leather goods, lots of denim and biker gear, cheesy wolf and eagle t-shirts, 50’s retro kitsch, flags, etc. The confederate flag was pretty present and I had to explain its history to the Scottish ladies, who upon hearing what it symbolizes exclaimed, “I can’t even believe it’s legal to fly that flag!” Ya know, me neither ladies.

Tricycle

There were teepees, face painting, cars, trucks. At one point, the Scottish ladies stood next to a Dodge Ram expressing disbelief, “Do people really drive trucks this big? WHY? Why do they need to?” Not really sure, ladies.

Overall, it was a super fun day. I ended up staying past dark again and barreling down pitch black foothill roads on my bike. Must be the Scottish influence.

Quaint French Towns

Annecy

Annecy

During my time here, I had an opportunity to visit many of the surrounding towns (Annecy, Chambery, Aix les Bains). The verdict: they are ALL quaint AF. They all had little medieval town centers with winding streets and surprise nooks and canals. Annecy has a big, beautiful, impossibly blue lake that I regret not going back and swimming in. I tried some bakeries around the area but none were as good as our little small town bakery in Lescheraines. At this point, I’m convinced that it is a prerequisite to be quaint as hell if you want to be a little town in France. I’m looking forward to performing more research on this hypothesis.

 

Things I’ll miss: Fresh eggs daily, beautiful vistas, fresh air, the boulangerie, quiet country living, cat drool

Things I won’t miss: consistent buzzing, always being on the lookout for spiders, bug corpses, everything “bug”, chicken poop, relative immobility, siesta time (So what if I want to eat lunch after 1p? Ohh, you’re going to starve me at LEAST until 5… maybe even 7? Great!)

Lake Annecy

Lake Annecy

Milan and a Peek at Turin

Galleria Vittorio Emanuele II

My camera did not go hungry over a few days in Milan

Hello my rabid fans, I am back! I know it’s been a while, but I’ve had a month of travel and location changes, in addition to trying to balance paid work with personal work (this is why I need to be independently wealthy, people). I’ve got a lot to catch you up on, so here we go!

As I mentioned in a previous post, in the middle of my France house sit, the homeowners were home for a week and encouraged me to take advantage of this time and take a trip. Due to proximity and my Italy virginity, I chose Milan.

France to Italy

The bus ride to Italy was super ugly

At first, I was going to do 4 days in Milan and 2 in Turin. Since I had to go through Turin on the way to Milan, it made sense to spend some time there as well. As soon as I booked my train tickets, though, I felt a little buyer’s remorse. I was going for too long, I was planning to spend too much money. I immediately starting rethinking some of the things I had already booked (lodging, transport, etc.). Some things are better not to book in advance, kids.

Since I am attempting to sum up 1.5 Italian cities in one post, I’ve decided to break it down into easy to digest sections. Find what interests you and enjoy!

Drinks and Fun

Aperitivo Aperitif

Aperol spritz and my free dinner!

Aperitivo, or Aperitif for you English speakers: One of my top favorite things about Milan is definitely the aperitif. This consists of a beverage, usually an Aperol or Campari-based drink. Upon ordering a drink, most places have a complimentary food offering that comes with. The quality of this varies from place to place. Sometimes they are just small things like olives and nuts, other times they are little cuts of pizza and bruschetta. At the better places, one could even make a meal out of it, as I did several times. Delicious AND cost-effective.

Bar Basso Negroni Sbagliato

My Negroni Sbagliato at Bar Basso

Bar Basso Peach Drink

I don’t remember what this frothy, peachy beauty was called, but hot damn!

Bar Basso: My first night, I went to Bar Basso, a place well-known for aperitivos. Toward the end of my first Negroni Sbagliato, it began to rain. Hard. I went inside and stood by the bar to finish my drink and wait out the rain. Well, wouldn’t you know that standing by the bar meant I could watch the bartenders do their work. They kept making this drink that involved putting whole peaches and Campari into a juicer and then topping the “juice” with Spumante. F my face. After you see a couple of these come out, you just need to try one. The rain was the excuse I needed. It was so frothy and delicious. Yum.

L’Ecurie: One night, I searched out karaoke, as that is a great way to start a conversation, especially when you have the cojones to do it by yourself. There were a couple of places in this one area of town, and I chose this one based on reviews. I was shocked to find out how pricey the drinks were (10 Euros for a beer or a drink), but eventually eased into it. After singing my first song, I met some ladies who were U.S. Army soldiers and wives stationed in Germany. We hung out all night and had very similar tastes in karaoke songs (Zombie, anyone?). It was a lot of fun. I will say that the KJ (Karaoke Jockey, keep up) was great in the beginning, but as the night wore on started ignoring certain people for others, which is what made us eventually close up and leave.

Meals

I’m kind of embarrassed to admit that I didn’t do the best job of hunting down amazing meals in Milan. My first time in Italy, and I botched it. I know. I know. Shame.

ristorante alba d'oro

This was not great going in OR coming out, sadly

Ristorante Alba d’Oro: After my first foray into aperitivos, I went off to Ristorante Alba d’Oro because it had good reviews, but those reviews did not match my experience. The waiter was lovely and incredibly friendly and accommodating. The food, however, was not. I ordered the black gnocchi (squid ink) special and it was pretty awful. Mushy. Non-descript. Bleh. AND it ended up making me sick later (which, believe you me, really amped up my hostel experience). Maybe I just ordered the wrong thing, who knows.

ravioleria sarpi

Delicious dumplings

Ravioleria Sarpi: I had read that Milan surprisingly had a pretty good Chinatown. Naturally, I had to go and try the dumplings at Ravioleria Sarpi, as I had read much about them. They had a little window on the street where I was able to order very affordable and tasty dumplings. After sitting on a stoop and chowing down, I went across the way to a wine bar, and drank a glass of wine on the street surrounded by bar goers.

Ratana Milan Menu

Ratana: I had read a bunch about Ratana, so I made a reservation so I could make sure to get my one fancy meal. This place was lovely, but I made a mistake in my ordering. Instead of going with whatever looked best to me on the menu (which was the risotto special, btw), I went with the saffron risotto and ossobuco because I had read on the internet that it was the quintessential thing to get here. Ends up that I spent way too much money, and I probably would have liked what I got more, and spent less money, if I had followed my own heart and not some internet person’s. What I got was quite good, but not $50 good. Lessons, folks!

Ratana Milan Ossobuco

Ossobuco and saffron risotto at Ratana

I feel like I kept missing out on the tasty spots to eat because so many trattorias were only open for lunch. I’m generally not ready for my big meal at lunch, especially if I am a tourist and am running around town (everyone knows this is kebab time). So, sadly, I kinda failed on the food front in Italy. Next time, I will be better.

Lodging

Koala Hostel: Don’t do it. Before leaving France, I had booked four nights at the Koala Hostel, which was conveniently walkable from Central Station. Upon arriving, I noticed quite quickly the lack of air conditioning in the lobby. See, the reason I booked this hostel at all was because Booking.com said they had AC. I thought maybe this was just the lobby and that the room would have it, but was disappointed when I got there to find a balmy room. I thought, ah well, maybe it won’t be so bad. I was wrong.

Unicredit Tower Milan

Unicredit Tower

That evening, I had one of the worst night’s sleep on record. I was on a top bunk in the corner. The room was stifling, despite the ceiling fan and open window. My roommates were incredibly clueless and rude. One dude’s phone started going off at 4am, playing the Rocky theme on repeat ad nauseum. Seriously, the song played on repeat for easily a half an hour. Eventually, it started up again and I just yelled “NO!” and then he made it stop. Oh, he could hear me say, “NO!” but couldn’t hear his phone blaring in his ear? Excellent.

THEN, at 7:30, his phone started going off again, but this time it was a different song. NO.

So, for anyone keeping score, I was unable to sleep due to stifling heat and impromptu phone concerts. To add to it all, apparently where I had chosen to eat dinner the night before was not the best place, so I had to get up to get sick numerous times throughout the night. It was a terrible night.

I woke up knowing I couldn’t do this for another night. At 7am, I was lying in bed searching desperately for other lodging options. I was hoping to get some or all of my money back, but even if not, being able to sleep would be worth the loss.

Bosco Verticale Milan

Bosco Verticale

I was fortunate to find a wonderful Airbnb for a good price in a convenient location, and the guy said I could come by early to drop off my luggage. I intended to at least cash in on the free breakfast before leaving the hostel, but as to be expected, it was worthless.

Of course, when I checked out, there were two people at the front desk. One was presumably the older lady that everyone had bad things to say about on the online reviews. I knew this would not bode well for my refund. I explained to the other girl at the front desk that the only reason I had booked this hostel was because it said it had AC online when it definitely did not. False advertising. Couldn’t sleep there. Could I get money back? Bla bla bla. She consulted with the older woman and it was decided that they could only refund me for one day (a whopping 17 Euro). This sucked, but I took it and went off to check into my life-saving Airbnb.

General Impressions

Milan Streets

Streets of Milan

My first impressions of Milan were definitely favorable. I liked the feel of the streets. It seemed like a friendly, open, quirky place. At times, it reminded me of the feel of Barcelona. They had full service vending machines all over town where you could get food, beverages, supplies. Pretty impressive.

I walked and walked all around, as I do. I’m not particularly fashion-minded, but I started noticing fashion everywhere. Thanks to my trip to Milan, I am now obsessed with wide-legged pants, or Palazzo pants. Unsure how that would look on my frame (beyond experiences with wide-legged skater jeans in high school, but the aesthetic I was going for was a bit different then, as was my frame), but I am digging them so hard. This reminded me that I am such a little sponge sometimes. I started dressing better when I was in Barcelona as well. What did you do to me, Denver?

Santa Maria delle Grazie

Basilica di Santa Maria delle Grazie, The Last Supper is in here, but I wasn’t allowed to see it

One day, I had walked all across town with the goal of going to see The Last Supper. I got to the little, humble-looking church where the famous painting resides, and stood in what I thought was the ticket line. Moments later, a lady came up and informed me and some others that we needed to have reserved a spot a month in advance to get in. Since I planned my trip just a few days in advance, this was sad news for me.

The Duomo was stunning and beautiful, as expected. Probably one of the more impressive cathedrals I have seen. It was so big, so ornately detailed. I spent hours exploring her in and out. I tend to really love cathedrals (and architecture, really) but this one was a bit different and I dug it.

The Duomo Milan

The Duomo

Turin Snapshot

Turin Fountain

A fountain in Turin

I ended up only spending an afternoon in Turin due to being eager to get back to my routine. My first experience between the bus and the train station made me think it wasn’t a particularly lovely city, but on my return when I had hours to walk it, I learned differently.

Turin Church

Turin is a beautiful, walkable city. It seemed more historical and had a lot of impressive old architecture. I did struggle to find decent lunch, which is a bit of a theme for me partially due to siesta time and things being closed when I am hungry. The shopping also seemed to be really great, but as I am terrible at shopping and I overpacked for this trip, I did not buy anything.

The Shroud of Turin

The Shroud of Turin is allegedly in that box

While there, I went to see the Shroud of Turin, which is allegedly the actual burial shroud of Jesus Christ. It apparently has his visage and blood stains imprinted onto it and everything. Sadly, they didn’t actually have it on display where it could be seen. It was in a glass case that was covered with a shroud of its own. Despite this, there were people legitimately crying to be in the presence of this artifact, which surprised me a bit. Apparently they only put it on display once every ten years or so. I guess it makes sense that a 2,000 year old piece of fabric would be very fragile, but maybe if they’d let me see it they would have had a convert out of me. Just saying…

Transport

Italy to France

45 minutes at the rest stop was a bit much, but the view made it better

The bus ride to Italy was easy, though we stopped at a rest stop for far too long, resulting in the bus getting in an hour and a half later than scheduled. This meant I had to run through Turin in order to catch the non-air conditioned (eek) train to Milan. Besides drowning in sweat, this ride was also relatively painless. I also had the good fortune to sit across from a gentleman wearing a T-shirt with three check boxes: Single. Taken. In the garage working on my Subaru. Guess which one was checked? Dream. Boat.

Ouibus wasn’t bad. The prices were right, but they definitely did not operate according to their timetable. Since I changed my plans to come back to France a couple of days earlier, I had to rebook my ticket. They obviously ignored my requests for a refund of the original, despite it being outside the 48 hour window. Being abroad, I wasn’t able to make the phone call so I emailed. They never responded. So, I ended up paying for two tickets in the end. Not ideal.

France to Italy Sunset

Ugliest Bus Ride Ever

We ended up getting back to France way behind schedule as well (why did we need 45 minutes at a rest stop?). This meant that the train I had to get on back to Aix les Bains wasn’t a train at all, but a night bus. Since it was after 9pm, there was no one around the train station to ask for information, so I had to rely on signage to find where this alleged bus would pick me up. Long story short, the bus pick-up was moved due to construction and I ended up missing that bus as well. My host was all set to pick me up at Aix les Bains, but ended up having to wait for hours. It was incredibly inconvenient for everyone and taught me a valuable lesson about bus travel in Europe.

Lessons Learned:

Do not book travel in advance, if necessary.

Do not count on bus travel being reliable.

Always double-check signage, don’t be afraid to ask people around.

If your hosts seem put out by your travel, even if it was their idea, skip it.

Be wary of hostels… don’t book too many nights in advance… scour those reviews.

I don’t appear as young as I think. Two separate French men greeted me on the street with “Madame” instead of “Mademoiselle.” I generally think I am sprightly as fuck, so imagine my surprise.

Order what YOU like, not what the internet tells you you should.

Galleria Vittorio Emanuele II

Galleria Vittorio Emanuele II

Impromptu Trip to Berlin

Berlin Skyline

The sun sets over Berlin

What do you do when you have a few days in between house sits? You go to Berlin, of course! 

When my time in Tenerife was up, I had a few days before I had to be in France for my next house sit. Originally, I was going to just spend those nights in Geneva, since I had to fly there anyway. This plan quickly changed once I started looking into cheap lodging in Geneva. Guess what? Apparently, there is nothing cheap in Geneva. EVER.

Berlin Bridge

So, I pulled out the big guns, got on Skyscanner and started looking at where I could get to in Europe on the cheap. They have a beautiful feature where you can leave your destination open and they show you where you can go based on price. It came down to a few cities in Germany, and Brussels. All appealed to me as I had never been to any of these locations.

Everything came together when I talked to a friend of mine who was doing a wee Eurotrip of her own. Hey! She was going to be in Berlin on those dates too. No. Brainer.

What’d we see?

It was something of a last minute decision, so I wasn’t able to do the research I normally would when going to a new city (this seems to be a trend for me these days). Luckily for me, however, my buddy knew a local. This really takes the pressure off. Show me YOUR Berlin. Though of course, I kept oscillating between the desire to coast and have no control and being nervous about the idea of giving up control. Can’t win.

Berlin Wall

The Berlin Wall

At the end of the day, I didn’t get to do all the tourist tourist stuff (I don’t have a photo of Brandenburg Gate, for example), but we did do a lot of exploring. One day on foot, another day by bike. Sometimes I prefer this, I know I’m missing the sights, but I feel like I’m seeing the city.

Prices

I keep thinking that all European cities are going to be around the same in terms of priciness, with Barcelona being my control city (dangerous, as Barcelona is so affordable… or at least was in 2010). I keep learning time and time again that this is not the case. Berlin was a little pricier than I expected, everything was about 1-2 Euros more than I would have thought.

Did we Party?

The days are super long in summer (4 am-10:30 pm), which probably contributed to what I am affectionately calling my “tourist fatigue.” I had expected there to be more partying in Berlin, as its reputation had preceded it, AND I had pals to play with. After two weeks of near solitude, I was ready for it. However, it didn’t turn up that way. The first night, my buddies were too tired, the second night, I was too tired, and so on. Of course, the one night we DID manage to go hard was the night before I had a 7 am flight the next day.

Berlin Doner Kebab

Way too psyched about my kebab

Guess who accidentally set their alarm for 4:30 pm and did not get on that flight, making Berlin more expensive than Geneva would have been?  Just GUESS.

Eating

We had lots of good food during our time in Berlin. Upon arriving, I remembered hearing that Berlin is one of the best places in the world to get a Döner Kebab. I love me a Döner Kebab. I had three in four days. I want one right now. Dammit. Surprisingly, I didn’t have a lot of German food while there. The only wurst I had was curry. It’s such an international city that there are so many awesome cuisines available, and we took advantage of that. I go into detail about what and where we ate further down. 

Berlin Curry Wurst

Curry Wurst!

German Playgrounds?!

One thing that stood out to me that I have no pictures of were the playgrounds. The playgrounds were SO AWESOME. I felt jealous of German children, saddened for American children. Every playground looked really conducive to using your imagination. They had some really fun contraptions, obstacle courses, tire swings, pirate ships. They were not nearly as safe or vanilla as playgrounds in the US have become. I have no photos of these because I saw most of them as we were biking by. In lieu of taking photos, I did make sure to yell enthusiastically about each one. My companions were like “Do you want us to stop?” and I was like “…yes…” Everyone loves a woman in her mid-thirties kicking their children off the tire swing, right?

Language

I feel a little impotent being in a country where I don’t speak the language at all (I’m so used to Spanish speaking countries). When I am somewhere different, I like to at least try with the language but since it was such a last minute trip I wasn’t able to study as much as I normally would. It’s easy to get embarrassed when I do so poorly, but pretty much everywhere in Berlin, English was spoken, so it wasn’t a huge problem. It’s easy to feel a little inferior when I struggle in this way, but then I remember that there are SO many places where I don’t speak the language and it’s okay. People make it work every day. It’s all a part of traveling and pushing your boundaries. Just do everything with a smile, be gracious, and try try try. Learning at least a few words in the native tongue will help ingratiate yourself… plus it will help learn a bit about the culture too.  

Impressions

All in all, my impression of Berlin was that it was pretty German. The architecture was clean, basic, functional. Public transport was very easy and efficient. There were a lot of little different neighborhoods that all had their own personality, which I adore. It was easily navigable. I felt safe all the time. Lots of green, as they have a pretty robust park system.

I will say, after a few days of being a tourist, I am looking forward to moving on to France and resuming my laid-back and inexpensive lifestyle. The thoughts of mountains, lakes, and French food don’t hurt either.

Freischwimmer view

Lunch by the water at Freischwimmer

Stand-out Establishments:

Freischwimmer Beer

Beer by the water at Freischwimmer

Freischwimmer – Our lovely local pal took us here for lunch on our first day. It is a little spot right on the river. Great views. I wasn’t 100% sure what I was ordering (“frankfurter” apparently did not mean sausage), but what arrived was super fresh, super tasty, and unlike anything I had had before.

W-Der-Imbiss – When I first looked at the menu, I was a little disappointed. This restaurant is mainly vegan and vegetarian with some salmon options. However, once my salmon tacos arrived, I was more than pleased. They were VERY tasty and had VERY fresh ingredients. My meal came with four tacos and I had no problem putting them all in my face. This restaurant was also in a lovely part of town, worth a wander. Great shopping nearby as well.  

Monster Ronson Ichiban Karaoke – As the friend I was meeting was a karaoke friend, we obviously had to get to singing. Our other friend’s niece (who is rad as fuck) is studying in Berlin, so she took us to Monster Ronson’s, which is an LGBTQ karaoke establishment that was very conveniently located. Monday was Multisexual Box Hopping day, which essentially means that you can hop into any open box (karaoke room, you perverts) and that you have to be cool. Duh. We stuck to the main stage, but it was awesome. Sadly, this night my buddy was ready to jam but I was feeling tourist fatigue. Also, my tummy felt weird from not drinking water all day. As my pal said, “Why would I order water when I could order beer?” It’s weird being in a place that does not offer free water. Weird and detrimental to your health.

Yarok – One of the main reasons I can never give up Facebook (despite how detrimental it can be to mental health) is that it keeps me connected to people I wouldn’t be connected to otherwise. This time around, I was able to connect with an old friend from high school (Middle school? Elementary school? All.) who used to live in Berlin and was going to be there at the same time as me. Bad. Ass. So, he took us to Yarok, which was really tasty Syrian food. Everything was super yummy, they had nice patio seating, and I got to reconnect with a human I hadn’t seen in probably 20 years. A definite win.

Our hostess

Bar Zum Schmutzigen Hobby

The baby queen

Bar Zum Schmutzigen Hobby – We went to this place for their Wednesday night drag show. The location was super cool. It was in this little network of alleys that had various establishments throughout. Awesome scene. Everyone at the bar was super friendly. The drag show was top notch. I ended up in the running to be crowned “Supergay of the Night” due to my knowledge of the first few notes of an En Vogue song, but the prize went to someone who was actually super gay, which I guess is only fair. After the drag show, there was an epic dance party. I had so much fun, I missed my flight. There’s probably a lesson here if only I could see it.  

YAAM Berlin Jerk Chicken

Delicious jerk chicken at YAAM

YAAM (Young African Art Market) – My pal and I just managed to stumble upon this place. The boys were feeling a little sick and a little tired, so Dee and I decided to take a long walk to dinner to see some of the city. As we were walking, I did a double-take. We passed this little opening in some fencing, and upon peeking inside there were all these different food and drink stalls. Of course, we went in to explore. There were various stalls with foods and items from African countries. We happened to find a Jamaican stall (yes, I know that’s not African, but it was there), so even though we were on our way to dinner, we decided to split a plate of jerk chicken. Best decision ever. I feel like we only scratched the surface of this place. Check it out!

Pratergarten Berlin

The crowd at Pratergarten for the game

Biergartens – We went to a few Biergartens, all were lovely. I’m a little partial to the Biergarten in the Tiergarten (giant city park) as it is in the midst of leafy green trees situated next to a lovely lake. Prater Biergarten, where we watched the game where Germany was eliminated from the World Cup was also a good time. There are a variety of beers and snacks available and I could definitely see myself whiling away some afternoons in this fashion.

 

Tiergarten Biergarten

The Biergarten in the Tiergarten

Two+ Weeks on Tenerife: Impressions and Specifics

What I ate, saw, did, and thought of it all during my stay on Tenerife

Black Sand Beach Tenerife

Black sand beaches were a definite highlight

My broad impressions of Tenerife over the past two weeks or so are thus: It is surprisingly dry. The neighborhood I was staying in is very small, and if I wanted to go to a specific village or to a specific beach or on a specific hike, I needed to take the bus. The bus, or guagua, however, is incredibly easy to navigate, but it can be a hurdle nonetheless.

Where to Stay

Las Americas Tenerife

Strolling by the waterside in Las Americas

If someone were to ask me for advice before a trip to the island, I would probably steer them away from Los Cristianos or Las Americas. These are the main tourist towns on this side of the island, and they just strike me as a bit inauthentic. Out of the two, I prefer Los Cristianos a bit, as my impressions of Las Americas were that it is similar to the Vegas strip or Disney World. A fake pop-up town, if you will, with the main goal being the collection of money from its visitors. Let’s just say that what I read of pink, British tourists eating fish and chips was actually pretty spot on. At least in these areas. Of course, some people are looking for this, but it’s not what I would recommend.  

Though, there was a REALLY beautiful mini-golf course in Las Americas that I would have loved to play if I had a friend. 

La Laguna Tenerife

La Laguna, the historic university town

In general, if I were to return, I feel like I might prefer to stay in the villages to the north or the inland villages. They seem to be where people actually live and have a bit more character. My time here probably would have been very different if I were located in a different neighborhood. But again, the free time and tranquil location were perfect for my writing ambitions.

Visitors and tourists looking for a beach vacation but wanting to avoid the tourist traps should look into staying in the area near Los Gigantes. The scenery was much more beautiful, it seemed like a bit more of a real town, and it’s closer to some of the lovely wilderness. This area also has access to a lot of the tourist activities that Los Cristianos and Las Americas have (ferries, water sports, scuba diving and snorkeling, hiking, etc.) without the insanity.  

Los Gigantes Tenerife

Los Gigantes

That being said, I’ve only been here for about two weeks and wasn’t out hoofing it every day. I really have only scratched the surface of Tenerife. These are my assumptions based on my limited experience. I was fortunate enough to meet some incredibly kind and generous people without whom I would have seen much less of the island. 

Food

I’ve been eating at home more than I do in the States (pat me on the back, please, I love eating out). This is despite the fact that fresh produce was either hard to come by or very expensive on the island. My home-cooked meals were modest, to say the least.

A majority of the meals I have had out have been pretty damn tasty and just what I was looking for. Most are served with mojo, two colors of sauces that you apply to your bread, meat, potatoes, and whatever else you’d like. A very welcome addition that reminded me a little bit of Peruvian cuisine.

Restaurants of note:

Meat Mountain Casa Odon Tenerife

Meat Mountain @ Casa Odon

  • Restaurante Casa Odon:
    • We stopped at this spot on our way back from Puerto de la Cruz. Legend says they specialize in mushrooms and meat, and boy do they! We got the ½ portion of mixed mushrooms (delicious) and a ½ portion of mixed meat. I don’t want to know what the full portion of meat looks like because what they brought us was meat mountain. Everything was super tasty, though (and I had meat for a week!).

Restaurante Otelo Tenerife

Restaurante Otelo – Delicious Fried Chicken!

  • Restaurante Otelo:
    • This restaurant sits at the foot of El Barranco del Infierno, and would be the perfect reward for a hike well done. Even if you don’t do the hike, they have an extensive patio with amazing views of both the sea and the gorge. They specialize in Pollo al ajillo (delicious, seasoned fried chicken). We accompanied this with roasted potatoes, salad, and of course, wine. Everything was so tasty, and the salad was the first serving of fresh veggies I had in some time.

Tajao Tenerife

This view was a short walk from Restaurante Manolo II

  • Restaurante Manolo II:
    • I didn’t take any pictures here because I was too busy meeting new friends and eating delicious, freshly caught seafood. This restaurant is in the little fishing village of Tajao, which means everything is fresh, fresh, fresh. Essentially, you go up to the counter, pick which specimens you would like to devour, and they cook them up for you right away. We ate everything tapas style with plates coming out at different times that we all shared. Treats such as: chipirones (fried baby squid that you pop in your mouth whole), calamari, a couple of whole fish, roasted potatoes, and lapas (limpets). All washed down with wine, of course.

Panadería Croquant Los Cristianos Tenerife

Delicious birthday cake from Panadería Croquant

  • Panadería Croquant:  
    • I arrived on Tenerife the day before my birthday, and my hosts being as sweet and generous as they were, insisted on buying me a birthday cake to celebrate. She took me to this bakery and had me choose my flavor. I chose the banana, rum, and caramel flavored cake pictured here. They were both a little skeptical of my flavor choice, but it turned out to be one of the best cakes I can remember having and everyone had multiple servings. 

My hosts also took me out for a birthday dinner in Costa de Adeje. We had tapas and paella and they were quite delicious. There are many restaurants in this little area, and the sea views were beautiful. Since there are so many there, and it was my first day, I don’t remember which restaurant we went to, but just a walk in the area should help you find one that suits your tastes. 

Activities

As I predicted, nature has been the great highlight of my time on Tenerife. I know I haven’t seen nearly enough. Most of the beautiful sites I’ve seen, I probably wouldn’t have without the wonderful generosity of new friends. I do not have access to a car or bike here, and sometimes getting motivated to take a bus ride to a far away place proved challenging and time-consuming.

Tenerife Sur

Getting thirsty just landing at Tenerife Sur

In general, I was surprised how dry and brown everything was. I was expecting a volcanic island paradise and must have forgotten that the Sahara desert is right across the water.

Thanks to the help of friends, I was able to see black sand beaches, rocky shorelines, and the relative lushness of the north, which has a totally different climate from the south. I was also shown some of the striking beauty of the south that I wouldn’t have even known to look for on my own (Los Gigantes, La Tejita, El Médano).

Masca

I had really wanted to do the Masca hike, but was unable to because it was closed for repairs of their jetty. I guess not too long ago some young hikers got stuck out there overnight due to the broken jetty. The hike, if open, apparently goes from the little mountain town of Masca, down through the gorge to a little secluded beach, and is said to be incredibly lovely.

El Barranco del Infierno

El Barranco del Infierno Tenerife

The start of the hike to El Barranco del Infierno

Barranco del Infierno Helmet

Not sure this would have stood up against a falling boulder, but its worth a shot

Instead, I was able to hike El Barranco del Infierno (hell’s gorge). This one can allegedly be quite dangerous. They make you wear a helmet, as a woman died last year from a rock falling on her. In fact, as I arrived, the man at the gate was on his walkie-talkie discussing a woman who had gotten injured in there and needed a helicopter out. We saw her in there before the end and it appears she either broke or sprained her ankle. Either way, as we rounded the corner to the waterfall, we were greeted by her shrieks of pain as the rescuers attempted to stabilize her ankle. Fun!

Despite these horror stories, I did not find it to be an incredibly challenging hike. You just need to make sure to keep your footing. Also keep in mind that on a sunny afternoon, there is NO shade for most of the hike, so bring sunscreen and plenty of water. 

El Barranco del Infierno Tenerife

The waterfall at the end of the gorge

El Teide

El Teide Tenerife Volcano

Majestic El Teide – my first volcano!

Originally, I was hoping to do the hike up El Teide, stay overnight at the hut, and hike up to the crater. Once arriving and seeing how dry the landscape was and short and scrubby the brush, I was glad I had a ride up the mountain. Still seems like a cool experience though and apparently, the star view from up there is unparalleled.

Instead, my hosts drove me up the volcano, and I’m so glad I got to see it. I’ve never been on a volcano before and it was beyond cool to see how the different colors (read: ages) of lava flows stacked upon one another. A must-see if on Tenerife.

Saying Goodbye

As always for me, it’s weird to be leaving a place. Especially a place you got used to living for a short while. How quickly you internalize your every day. Yet, I will never see that place again. Never sleep in that bed, brush my teeth in that sink, see any of those cats. I know this is normal and not out of the ordinary, but it feels strange to me. I can be so sentimental.

Black sand beach Tenerife

Adios, Tenerife!

Things I am glad to leave behind:

The water. The water is desalinated sea water. It is incredibly hard and my hair and skin have been staging quite a revolt.

Things I will miss:

Perfect weather every day. Regular sea vistas. New friends. 

 

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